Three Big Fears

We all have things we’re afraid of. There are big things, like a tornado, and little things, like a spider. Spider Many of our fears are totally irrational but we have them none-the-less. I’m going to confess, to you,  3 of my fears.

Number one: barfing. When the stomach bug is “going around” I’m in a constant state of inner turmoil. Not only do I get that heart pounding adrenaline rush of fear if I see (or hear) barfing, I’m in even more trouble if I’m the actual one doing the deed. It’s so bad that when one of my kids is sick, I’m not rubbing their back and saying loving things as they throw up, I’m usually at least 10 feet away shouting at them – be sure to get it in the toilet, bucket, bag, trash can, on the tile, not on the carpet – and cringing and feeling nauseous and having a major heebie jeebie attack. One time Jeff got the stomach bug. I quarantined him to our bedroom with full access to the master bath – neither of which I entered except to peek in from the door and shout a “do you need anything” or “are you alive?” once in a while. If he emerged from quarantine I followed him around with cleaning products wiping down surfaces and I did not reenter the sealed area until he (in his weakened state) cleaned everything thoroughly (and then I cleaned it again). I know this does not sound very loving, and if one of my family members is sick and no one else is around to help, I do what I have to – but for days after I feel queasy. I’ve been totally blessed in the fact that I’ve married a man who can stomach a clean-up job. I’ve also been blessed with a child who pukes if she coughs too hard. Just don’t count on me to be the one to hold your hair back.

Number two: peeing in my pants. I’m not talking about every day peeing in my pants but getting into a crash while driving when I have to pee…. and then peeing in my pants. The crash would be bad enough, but I’m completely scared that when I get in said crash that I would pee in my pants and then be injured (or worse, uninjured) with wet pants.   Luckily (and I’m knocking on wood riiigghht… NOW) I’ve never been in a car accident, but in the meantime, I’m going to be sure to use the bathroom before I drive anywhere.

Number three: car submersion.  I’ve had this fear since I was a very little girl… and if it happens hopefully all my mental planning will pay off. I have a fear of my car going off the road and into a deep river/lake/sea/ocean/creek/stream/puddle and being submerged. I picture seeing the water outside the car and I remember from some educational movie that I saw at one time that I won’t be able to open the doors until the pressure inside and outside the car is equal – I have to wait in the car until the water is practically up to the ceiling, take a deep breath, open the door and swim up. There’s a lot to remember! This is the first time that I’m driving a car with electric windows. This fear is so deeply ingrained that in the past, I insisted on crank windows because then you don’t have to wait to open the door. You can take your deep breath, crank down your window, and swim out. Luckily I found a hammer type thing to help me escape from my electric window jail. I can smash my window that will not open.  It also has a cutter on it which I will totally need because now I not only have to worry about getting myself out – but two small children too. OK, stay calm, get hammer tool, cut kids out of car seats, smash window, push kids and myself up to the surface…. no wonder crossing bridges makes me anxious.

You now know 3 of my weird fears. I’m sure you have some that are even weirder.


2 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by Brooke on November 15, 2010 at 5:37 pm

    Oh, man! I HATE bridges for that same reason. I’m scared to death that I wouldn’t be able to get everyone out. I’ve had this fear for a while, but it’s only gotten worse since having kids. I think drowning would be one of the worst ways to go…


  2. Posted by Sam on November 15, 2010 at 9:58 pm

    I am totally with you on the car submersion. And it totally went into overdrive with the kids. I hate going over bridges.

    My other one is that the gas pump will explode and I have to get the kids out of the car.


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